Saturday, December 13, 2014

PLANET MOTHERFUCKER'S MOST WANTED: GRISLY KRINGLE


You better watch out!
It's pointless to cry!
'Cause if you're on his naughty list,
   all you can do is DIE!!!

Grisly Kringle is the most infamous of Planet Motherfucker's holiday hatchetmen.  He's a hulking, dead-eyed brute in a crimson suit, and carries an axe and a sack full of awful implements ranging from the mundane (boxcutters, switchblades, hammers) to the atypical (fireplace pokers, power tools, flamethrowers) to the ridiculous (gimmicked toys, explosive ornaments, electrified lights, Ho-Ho-Ho-embossed brass knuckles).  The relentless Kringle wages a punishing one-man war on lechery, greed, duplicity, and the people that love them...and he'll eradicate any innocents who oppose his crusade.

Kringle isn't like most masked maniacs.  He's active day and night.  He doesn't haunt a specific locale; no, he roams far and wide spreading Christmas fear.  Kringle's also more "intrusive" in that he actively breaks into residences, inns, and businesses to get at his victims, instead of catching them unaware in the woods.  Dude even straight-up knocks on people's doors, and guts them right there on their porches.

And Kringle is the rare lunatic that frequently runs afoul of children.  When he does, he asks them in a throaty growl if they've been good this year.  Those that answer truthfully in the affirmative are given gifts of weaponry...but the naughty ones suffer just like his adult prey.

There are rumors those other aforementioned calendar killers (such as Baby Grue Year, Martin Luger King, St. Splatrick, Beaster Bunny, The Arbor Barber, All Hallow's Evan, and even The Hanukkiller) are actually Grisly Kringle in different attire.  If true, he may be the most prolific slasher Planet Motherfucker has ever seen, with body counts in the thousands!

No one knows Kringle's true identity, and rumors swirl about his origins.  Some even say he's a robot!


Grisly Kringle
Masked Slasher
Attributes:  Agility d10Smarts d6Spirit d10Strength d10Vigor d12
Skills:  Driving d6, Fighting d10Intimidation d8Notice d8, Repair d6Shooting d10Stealth d10
Derived:  Charisma -8Pace 6Parry 7Toughness 11 (2)
Hindrances:  BloodthirstyMeanUgly
Edges:  BrawnyCounterattackFirst StrikeImproved FrenzyHarder To KillImprovisational Fighter, Killer InstinctImproved Nerves Of SteelSweep
Gear:  Battle Axe (STR +d8), Brass Knuckles (STR +d4)Pretty Much Every Other Weapon EverPadded Suit (Armor +2)
Special Abilities
  • HE KNOWS!!!:  Grisly Kringle is drawn to the treacherous, the cruel, and the depraved, and he always knows lies from the truth.  Good luck hiding your most terrible secrets!
  • The World Is His Workshop:  When Kringle corners a fleeing victim, there is invariably some sinister scenery (rack of antlers, woodchipper, etc.) in the background all ready for conveniently murderous use.

















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